Week 2 NFL Rundown (NFC East games only)
Mike Tanier
FootballOutsiders.com
The Colts are unstoppable. The Saints are horrible. Mike Tomlin is a genius. Bobby Petrino is a nincompoop. The Eagles will never field a punt cleanly. The Patriots will go 16-0. The Jets will go 0-16. The Cowboys will score 720 points this season. The Bears will score 48. Every commercial on television this year will feature Peyton Manning in some way.
Actually, the last conclusion is pretty valid.
For six days, sportswriters celebrate the start of the football season by leaping to ludicrous snap judgments based on very limited information. We scrap common sense, pounce onto and off of bandwagons, anoint new champions and dethrone old ones. It's like Mardi Gras, only sober, fully clothed and cabbage-less.
Forgive us mainstream media types. We're hyenas, starving after a football-free summer. Week 1 is like a juicy-but-small gazelle leg tossed into our midst. We can't help but pick it clean, break the bones and gnaw on the marrow. It's easy to write things like "Freddie Keiaho is the next Jack Lambert" when you are in mid-feeding frenzy.
Of course, Rundown is the last bastion of rationality in a world gone mad with conclusion-jumping. With years of experience and thousands of statistics at our disposal, we know better than to read too much into 60 minutes of football. So keep your powder dry, dear reader. The Bears are still pretty good. The Texans aren't a playoff team. It was just one game.
Gotta run now. Lions playoff tickets go on sale in 20 minutes.
Packers at Giants: As of this writing, there were conflicting reports about Eli Manning's health status. We had no choice but to plug in the Rundown Preview-o-Matic to produce a generic team report. Here goes:
Manning's shoulder is (bruised/severely bruised/separated/floating in the East River), so he is (probable/questionable/doubtful/highly doubtful) for this game. The Giants are counting on (Manning/Jared Lorenzen/Anthony Wright/Tim Hasselbeck) under center, but the team is concerned that (he'll revert to his inconsistent ways after a fine effort in the opener/he'll stuff himself with Krispy Kremes and get stuck in the tunnel before kickoff/he'll play like Anthony Wright/his wife will out-nutty Tom Coughlin).
The Packers are easier to dissect. Their defense is good, young and fast. They'll force the Giants quarterback to make a few errors. On offense, Green Bay's receiving corps has potential, its offensive line is still developing and the running game is non-existent. Brett Favre produced some dazzling "here ya go" highlights against the Eagles last week, but he had a pretty poor game overall. Favre and company are just good enough to move the ball against a disorganized, dispirited defense. Luckily, they're facing one. Take the Packers and two points, no matter who starts at quarterback for the Giants.
Cowboys at Dolphins: The Cowboys racked up 45 points against the not-ready-for-prime-time Giants defense on Sunday Night, but Fort Worth Star Telegram columnist Jim Reeves was most impressed by the pass that Tony Romo didn't throw. Romo had Giants lineman Jason Tuck draped all over him and briefly thought about chucking the ball in the general direction of a somewhat open receiver. Instead, he wisely ate the ball and took the sack. "It shows just how much he has grown up in a year," Reeves said of the play.
Romo wasn't the only Cowboys player demonstrating a newfound maturity. Terrell Owens was held without a reception in the first half, but he came on strong late in the game instead of drifting away to planet T.O. "I came down at halftime and saw him over there and rather than dwell on what happened in the first half, he stepped up for us out there and made plays for us," said Jerry Jones, who is never hesitant to inject himself into the story.
That, plus the play of the offensive line, the running backs and Jason Witten, is the good news. The bad news: The Cowboys defense was pretty terrible on Sunday night, and it won't get any better with defensive tackle Jason Ferguson out for the year. "How about my offense, huh?" asked head coach Wade Philips at the start of Sunday's press conference. Philips, of course, is a defensive coach who lets Jason Garrett call most of the offensive shots. Philips could chuckle on Sunday, but it was back to work on Monday: The Cowboys can't afford to live and die by 45-35 shootouts, because that will put too much of a strain on Romo's decisiveness and Owens' groundedness.
For the time being, though, a bombs-away offense and a cream cheese defense will be adequate. The Dolphins aren't going to win a shootout against anybody. A soft spot in their schedule arrives in two weeks (Raiders, Texans, Browns), and Cam Cameron will need that time to work out the bugs in his system and make some hard choices about his veterans. Until then, they'll scuffle. Take the Cowboys, lay the points.
Redskins at Eagles: Eagles fans never thought they'd miss Reno Mahe, the no-frills return man who clung to their roster for several years despite his lack of razzle and complete absence of dazzle. After the Eagles handed the Packers 10 points on two muffed punts, the Philly Phaithful are actually clamoring for the return of Mahe. Or Brian Mitchell. Or Via Sikahema. Or Wally Henry.
Both the Redskins and Eagles played sloppy 16-13 games last week; the Eagles lost in Green Bay, but the Redskins won in overtime. The Redskins' win came at a heavy price: right tackle Jon Jansen, one of the team's best players, is out for the year with an ankle injury.
"It takes away a little bit from the win," right guard Randy Thomas said after the game. "I'm down about that. That's a blow, man. That's a rock."
With Jansen out, veteran Todd Wade will get the start. Wade was on the inactive list last week with a shoulder injury he claims will be a non-issue against the Eagles. "It's manageable. There's harnesses and things like that I'll wear, but I feel good about it," Wade told the Washington Post. "It's nothing I'm worried about."
Jason Campbell is the one who should be worried. The one thing the Eagles did especially well in Green Bay was pressure the quarterback. The Redskins won't put many points on the board, and the Eagles offense should be more in sync after a poor effort in the opener. That seven-point opening line may be scary, but the Eagles are much better than they looked on Sunday, while the Redskins looked just about right. Lay the points, take the Eagles and hide your head under a blanket every time the Redskins punt.
FootballOutsiders.com
The Colts are unstoppable. The Saints are horrible. Mike Tomlin is a genius. Bobby Petrino is a nincompoop. The Eagles will never field a punt cleanly. The Patriots will go 16-0. The Jets will go 0-16. The Cowboys will score 720 points this season. The Bears will score 48. Every commercial on television this year will feature Peyton Manning in some way.
Actually, the last conclusion is pretty valid.
For six days, sportswriters celebrate the start of the football season by leaping to ludicrous snap judgments based on very limited information. We scrap common sense, pounce onto and off of bandwagons, anoint new champions and dethrone old ones. It's like Mardi Gras, only sober, fully clothed and cabbage-less.
Forgive us mainstream media types. We're hyenas, starving after a football-free summer. Week 1 is like a juicy-but-small gazelle leg tossed into our midst. We can't help but pick it clean, break the bones and gnaw on the marrow. It's easy to write things like "Freddie Keiaho is the next Jack Lambert" when you are in mid-feeding frenzy.
Of course, Rundown is the last bastion of rationality in a world gone mad with conclusion-jumping. With years of experience and thousands of statistics at our disposal, we know better than to read too much into 60 minutes of football. So keep your powder dry, dear reader. The Bears are still pretty good. The Texans aren't a playoff team. It was just one game.
Gotta run now. Lions playoff tickets go on sale in 20 minutes.
Packers at Giants: As of this writing, there were conflicting reports about Eli Manning's health status. We had no choice but to plug in the Rundown Preview-o-Matic to produce a generic team report. Here goes:
Manning's shoulder is (bruised/severely bruised/separated/floating in the East River), so he is (probable/questionable/doubtful/highly doubtful) for this game. The Giants are counting on (Manning/Jared Lorenzen/Anthony Wright/Tim Hasselbeck) under center, but the team is concerned that (he'll revert to his inconsistent ways after a fine effort in the opener/he'll stuff himself with Krispy Kremes and get stuck in the tunnel before kickoff/he'll play like Anthony Wright/his wife will out-nutty Tom Coughlin).
The Packers are easier to dissect. Their defense is good, young and fast. They'll force the Giants quarterback to make a few errors. On offense, Green Bay's receiving corps has potential, its offensive line is still developing and the running game is non-existent. Brett Favre produced some dazzling "here ya go" highlights against the Eagles last week, but he had a pretty poor game overall. Favre and company are just good enough to move the ball against a disorganized, dispirited defense. Luckily, they're facing one. Take the Packers and two points, no matter who starts at quarterback for the Giants.
Cowboys at Dolphins: The Cowboys racked up 45 points against the not-ready-for-prime-time Giants defense on Sunday Night, but Fort Worth Star Telegram columnist Jim Reeves was most impressed by the pass that Tony Romo didn't throw. Romo had Giants lineman Jason Tuck draped all over him and briefly thought about chucking the ball in the general direction of a somewhat open receiver. Instead, he wisely ate the ball and took the sack. "It shows just how much he has grown up in a year," Reeves said of the play.
Romo wasn't the only Cowboys player demonstrating a newfound maturity. Terrell Owens was held without a reception in the first half, but he came on strong late in the game instead of drifting away to planet T.O. "I came down at halftime and saw him over there and rather than dwell on what happened in the first half, he stepped up for us out there and made plays for us," said Jerry Jones, who is never hesitant to inject himself into the story.
That, plus the play of the offensive line, the running backs and Jason Witten, is the good news. The bad news: The Cowboys defense was pretty terrible on Sunday night, and it won't get any better with defensive tackle Jason Ferguson out for the year. "How about my offense, huh?" asked head coach Wade Philips at the start of Sunday's press conference. Philips, of course, is a defensive coach who lets Jason Garrett call most of the offensive shots. Philips could chuckle on Sunday, but it was back to work on Monday: The Cowboys can't afford to live and die by 45-35 shootouts, because that will put too much of a strain on Romo's decisiveness and Owens' groundedness.
For the time being, though, a bombs-away offense and a cream cheese defense will be adequate. The Dolphins aren't going to win a shootout against anybody. A soft spot in their schedule arrives in two weeks (Raiders, Texans, Browns), and Cam Cameron will need that time to work out the bugs in his system and make some hard choices about his veterans. Until then, they'll scuffle. Take the Cowboys, lay the points.
Redskins at Eagles: Eagles fans never thought they'd miss Reno Mahe, the no-frills return man who clung to their roster for several years despite his lack of razzle and complete absence of dazzle. After the Eagles handed the Packers 10 points on two muffed punts, the Philly Phaithful are actually clamoring for the return of Mahe. Or Brian Mitchell. Or Via Sikahema. Or Wally Henry.
Both the Redskins and Eagles played sloppy 16-13 games last week; the Eagles lost in Green Bay, but the Redskins won in overtime. The Redskins' win came at a heavy price: right tackle Jon Jansen, one of the team's best players, is out for the year with an ankle injury.
"It takes away a little bit from the win," right guard Randy Thomas said after the game. "I'm down about that. That's a blow, man. That's a rock."
With Jansen out, veteran Todd Wade will get the start. Wade was on the inactive list last week with a shoulder injury he claims will be a non-issue against the Eagles. "It's manageable. There's harnesses and things like that I'll wear, but I feel good about it," Wade told the Washington Post. "It's nothing I'm worried about."
Jason Campbell is the one who should be worried. The one thing the Eagles did especially well in Green Bay was pressure the quarterback. The Redskins won't put many points on the board, and the Eagles offense should be more in sync after a poor effort in the opener. That seven-point opening line may be scary, but the Eagles are much better than they looked on Sunday, while the Redskins looked just about right. Lay the points, take the Eagles and hide your head under a blanket every time the Redskins punt.
posted by The Gryphon at 10:07 AM
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